Sunday,
September 9, 2012
Dear
Dee,
My
brother, Dennis, has stopped his chemotherapy and made his peace with fate. Last
weekend he gathered his two sons together and explained this to them. He told
them about all the arrangements he has made and even laid out his burial
outfit: black jeans and a Pink Floyd t-shirt. Usually, once someone reaches
this level of acceptance, the end isn’t far away. I told him I hated that it
has come to this but I applaud his taking control of his life and destiny. As I
did with Joe’s passing, I wrote some words and sent them to my nephew, who will
deliver them on my behalf. And so it goes.
I have
written to Congresswoman Barbara Lee’s Senior Caseworker to ascertain whether
or not the BOP ignored her letter on my behalf. Considering that she sits on
the House Appropriations Committee, I think it took some chutzpah to be so
disrespectful to her. But overall, it looks like I will be waiting until
February to try again for my transfer. In the meantime, please continue to
monitor the census at Terminal Island in Long Beach. I know of two people who
have transferred there in recent months.
It
looks as though my divorce will become final on the 25th of this
month. However, we will not be separating our finances until the house sells. It
is my fervent hope that the house sells by the midpoint in my sentence, which
occurs next April. That way, I will be able to save my pension checks, which are
now going toward house payments, in a savings account for when I get out.
On to “church.”
The
chalice lighting from CM was a history of his spiritual growth and the valued
associations that he made with people of other faiths throughout his long life.
It set the tone for a theme of inner-connectivity that ran through all of my
readings today.
The
sermon was by Rev. Kate Lore of 1st Unitarian Church of Portland,
Oregon. The sermon’s title was “Divine Persuasion—A Look at Process Theology.”
It is no exaggeration to say that my mind was fairly-well blown. Her sermon
covered the high points of every one of my beliefs that I have been developing,
including much that I took away from the book, “The Field.” Process theology
deals with things that are being examined in the laboratories of science, such
as “collective consciousness.” She talks of how everyone and everything in
existence can be reduced to its smallest component—the atom. And how these
atoms ae recycled, so that you or I may very well possess atoms that once belonged
to Shakespeare or Joan of Arc. This is precisely what I took away from “The
Field” which was where I first saw that these cells in our bodies can
communicate with each other and as some scientists believe, with the cells of
other bodies. Thus, the interconnectivity of all mankind or, as we UUs put it,
the interdependent web of existence. So what I believe, much of which I thought
I had made up myself, has a name, and it is Process Theology.
I am
going to share this sermon with T, a friend here who is a devout Christian. A
few months back, I made a clumsy and fumbling attempt to explain my beliefs to
him. But I had to stop because it came out sounding like an attack on his
beliefs, which was not my intention. I think Rev. Lore does a much better job
of it. I don’t want to try to wean him away from his Christian faith. I just
want him to understand mine. I’m sure he’ll still think I will end up burning
in hell and that’s OK too. (His belief, not me burning in hell.)
Rev.
Fleck wrote of our need to know others and to be known by them (that
interconnectivity theme again). He wrote of how frightening it can be to not
know or be known. I know how true this is from moving from one county jail to
another and finally to where I am now. I will face it again if I get a transfer
and yet again if I end up living in a strange city.
That’s
it for another week. Love, Steve
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